There’s a Disturbance in the Force
I imagine it’s inevitable and every writer faces a tragic truth one day. I’d always believed simply sitting in front of a blank sheet of paper or of course now a computer screen would ultimately produce the desired result and emit forth a wealth of plentiful prose. It was simply a matter of time I told myself and the words would flow like money from a drunken gambler at a Las Vegas craps table. Truthfully they always did, until now.
I must face the fact that after the captivity of COVID I’ve run out of things to say.
My mind is clouded by the numbness that grows out of boredom and despite my efforts I can’t find the words, or any words actually.
Yet, of course why would I? Cooped up like a veal my mind has glossed over by too much media and carbohydrates.
What a combo. Although of course this seems to be a teenager’s dream and I’m certain it once was mine, the lack of stimulus has become malignant.
Like everyone I’ve strived to remain relevant and in tune with the universe.
Calls to friends whom like myself feel the need to escape their bonds of virus prison may for a moment lessen the lack of communication with my fellow beings, but this isn’t entirely about conversation.
Perhaps that’s what we’ve forgotten or probably never before knew.
Living is not predicated by simply interacting with others, but with the other.
So what is the other other?
The other is the mere act of living within the world.
COVID has forced us to retreat and that is harmful to what creates the energy we all absorb into our lives.
Of course there are many that go out to stores, teach or work over the Internet or meet with friends.
So what of those who choose to remain behind closed doors hopefully safe from COVID’s clutches?
Strangely enough the result is the same for both.
My friends that go out feel equally as stifled and imprisoned as those who hide away.
I couldn’t imagine why and it didn’t seem to make any sense at all.
Yet truly it does.
If we believe there is an energy that permeates the world and enters into each life than the virus has zapped that power whether or not you’re home or outside.
There is to put it quite simply a disturbance in the force, young Skywalker and everyone feels the interruption.
Of course I’m not the first to speak about life forces and energy and I’m sure I can’t possibly explain it all as well as Master Yoda, but I’m actually witnessing the effects with my own eyes. I’m guessing that is something none of us has noticed before.
How many times have you felt something uplifting while just walking down a street looking in windows, how satisfying it was driving a new car on a gorgeous spring day, listening to music and simply enjoying your freedom? Or is it that happy feeling holiday shopping in the mall when everyone is rushing from store to store intent on finding the perfect gift?
Perhaps sitting by the ocean and wiggling your toes in the wet sand on a cool autumn day when the beach is quiet and the waves are your only company that you feel alive and at peace.
These small moments that don’t amount to anything earth shaking like creating world peace, cleansing the oceans or curing cancer seem all you need.
There is satisfaction in being part of a world that is in motion, absorbing the essence of life in those around you. The unique connection each human being creates by simply existing in the universe, feeling and contributing to the energy.
This is what COVID has taken from us. This is the frustration and hopelessness humans feel when they are captive and lose their sense of community.
Going for a walk, taking a drive or visiting with friends seems as though it’s making things better, and perhaps for a time it works. Still it’s a band-aid on a massive wound and that’s why despite how hard we try we can’t stop the bleeding.
We need to see a smile on the person walking towards us, we need to feel the hugs of our family and friends, to travel and absorb the energy of novel places, new sights and active people. There is something palpable about a busy street or airport filled with travelers. Our souls require more than the latest Netflix offering, we crave the other.
Human beings cannot survive behind masks, closed off from the life force that sustains us.
There’s a reason people are suspicious of loners, anti social behavior and shut ins. Most view it as an unnatural and foreign state.
Of course some people are quite content by themselves and most are happy to be alone some of the time. Only it’s in the knowing that life is outside the door for the taking we remain secure and sane.
In our DNA we are social animals and being blocked off from the other has consequences. During this pandemic for the first time we as a human race are seeing these results up close and personal.
So what can one do to create at least a bit of the energy? At this point I suppose it’s the band-aid effect upon which we must rely. Call a friend, social distance, go outside, walk or take a ride. Have a picnic or go to the beach, there is something quite calming about the ocean. It won’t restore all our energy but a portion at least until our tank is once more full.
Without putting a name to it we sense something is missing and the effect on our life force is stifling. So until we are free to experience others and the other as well, I wish you fulfilling days and may the force always be with you.