The golden years are a conundrum. It seems the irony  is palpable.

Finally, at a point in life when you have all the time in the world to do as you wish, go where you please and live as you choose, you have far less inclination to do any of it.

The older one becomes, the lower their standards and expectations become.

When someone asks how I am, I have a pat answer, “I woke up on the right side of the grass this morning, so it’s a glorious day.”

Now there was a time this answer would not have been my response to that question.

This isn’t a value judgement in any way, but when young we maintain certain beliefs about how we should live. When these plans don’t always come to fruition, we are disappointed. We become determined to rectify that situation and make expectation become reality.

As we live our life consumed with a busy schedule filled with dreams to pursue, children to raise or businesses to build, we find settling unacceptable.   

Now I’m not saying that young people complain. That is not the case at all. I’m merely pointing out that living when one is expectant and busy is a far different reality from life in the golden years.

I have also noticed that a great deal of what one can anticipate from life is determined genetically.

Yes, I know that countless authorities have spoken and continue to speak about how we can control how we age. I agree to a degree that is very true.

Eating healthy, exercise and attitude is of course a vital component in the process.

Yet, in some ways many find aging well is dependent on other factors, some of which are not under our control.

Certain health factors have a genetic component and although there are new meds and cures that didn’t previously exist there is no cure for everything.

So, is it true many seniors are beginning to shun away from the constant tumult they felt was mandatory for a productive life?

Is it okay in lieu of attending a luncheon sitting with women you barely know, to stay home and invent a recipe you’ve been contemplating for ages?

Or not driving at night to the theatre to see a play when you have ten streaming channels filled with movies, documentaries and old sitcoms to entertain you?

People are constantly telling me after getting up, getting dressed, putting on make-up and driving miles to go somewhere, they need a day of recuperation.

I truly envy my friends that can still swat a pickleball, run out to lunch or work and feel no need to slow down.

Are they the majority or a small minority? No idea.

Perhaps perfection exists in individuality.  

As long as one is able to move about freely, there is no reason not to enjoy freedom.

Many seniors still travel a great deal and cruises are a great compromise.

Although I have a friend that cruises and claims some of these new ships are the size of a small city. Despite the menus overflowing with calories, he always loses weight from all the walking.

A good thing I suppose, but it can also be exhausting.

Is running all over actually stress inducing and tiring for many?

I believe it can be. Many enjoy being home, cooking, gardening, watching movies, engaging in a hobby they’ve never previously had the time for.

So many women enjoy playing cards or maj jong. Many men golf, hike and still bowl.

Is the fact many of the things we enjoy are home based a negative? Does cutting ourselves off more actually cut into our life span?

The world seriously had an aha moment when 2020 brought a whole new way of living. COVID removed our ability to wander about freely. After a time families formed “pods” visiting among themselves, but being forced into hibernation certainly was a game changer.

One of the things I and many others discovered was that staying at home wasn’t as horrible as we’d anticipated.

Instead of becoming a prison- like existence, it was almost liberating.

People began rediscovering many of the hobbies, interests, and fun activities they’d long ago forgone.

So many rediscovered or learned to cook. Streaming was a “thing” and everyone chatted about the latest “hot” shows on Netflix or other streamers.

Jigsaw puzzles arrived regularly from Amazon and Face Time and Zoom opened new worlds of engagement.

Once people began venturing out, many decided spending more time at home was a new option worth exploring.

Reading, painting and many other activities had morphed into enjoyable ways of spending a day. One’s own company was now welcome and acceptable. Yes, during COVID at times there was a sense of forced loneliness, but new options now created avenues for self-exploration and fulfillment.

So, which is a healthier lifestyle, in or out?

I’m guessing it’s up to the individual what they feel comfortable with and can handle.

It also may come down to what we’ve always been taught, moderation is the key to everything. A bit of this and a tad of that creates variety and balance.

Whatever one decides to do, it’s important we remain grateful for having time as we age. If at the end of a day you’ve enjoyed the journey through it, it sounds all good to me. P.S. check out the movie, The Penguin Lessons on Netflix. I think it’s an extremely enjoyable way to spend some of that time.