Tag: Canasta

Can Wishing Really Make It So?

What if a genie jumped in front of you on the way to the kitchen and offered you one wish?

I think it’s a sure bet you’d stop your search for something chocolate to eat and pay attention.

But here’s the thing, what would you wish for if you only had one wish?

Sure, you believe you’d know immediately, but would you?

Standing there with the opportunity to change everything about your life could you decide what’s most important?

Even if you were confident what wish you’d make, would it actually cover the entire specter of your needs?      

I’m thinking probably not.

It’s easy to say if I had one wish I’d want…

But is it really?

What wish would truly change everything and give you the power to control the things you never wanted to happen? Or the things you do?

Of course, we’d all want to wish our loved ones back into our lives. And yes, it would be wonderful.

Yet wouldn’t it be better had they never left us in the first place? Wouldn’t it have been better to spare everyone the pain and heartbreak that comes with loss?

Sure, but how could you ever accomplish that end?
And what about the choices you made that didn’t pan out the way you thought they would? That weren’t completely thought out, made in haste or had the opposite effect you’d anticipated?

That’s a lot of wishes to cover; mistakes, bad choices and the do overs we aren’t allowed.

So what wish might encompass enough territory to truly make an amazing difference in our life’s path? Is it even possible to land on one?

To waste a wish would be foolish when there is only one to be had? It’s quite the dilemma.

I’ve thought about this a great deal, and yes, I have too much time on my hands. I think I may have solved the problem of what wish may include the greatest amount of good.

Go with me here, please.

I think I’d ask the Genie, who by the way looks and sounds just like Robin Williams, for a chance to fix every bad thing before it happens.

Huh?

That’s right. I’d want to know if any choice I was making, or anybody I knew was making turned out bad before it happened. That way I could change the outcome and prevent bad stuff from happening.

Could you only imagine how different the world would be if we all could stop the horrible things from happening?

Yes, I understand the whole Butterfly Effect thing.

How one small change can cause a massive ripple through time, but isn’t that the point? The consequences of the actions are entirely the point.

So, although the Butterfly Effect may change the outcome, isn’t it the actual outcome that we wish to avoid?

How wonderful would it be to warn the people we love to get their heart checked before it’s too late? Or to get any medical test that would stop them from getting sick. To stay home when going out could be deadly or watch those steps before they fall.

So many things and small choices can lead us down a road of no return, but the wish could stop all that.

It would literally undo the unfortunate results of any act or decision that had resulted in irreparable harm.

However, would anyone heed our warnings? That’s another blog entirely.

To erase the choices that have taken us to a place we’d never wished to enter would be amazing.

It would be a mistake proof existence. No regrets, no beating ourselves up over stupid or foolish options, never losing the ones we love to pain and suffering.

We would know before bad things happened. That way we’d be able to prevent the moves we and others made that negatively impacted our existences.

But there’s the rub. For there already exists a warning bell within us which rings to advise us about mistakes. That little gnawing in the pit of our gut that is saying loud and clear, this isn’t a good idea. Yet too often we ignore this voice or override its alert.

Do we suffer afterward? Yes, but by then it’s too late. But perhaps ignoring the voice is the only choice we actually can make, because the control doesn’t really lie with us.

Of course, I’m assuming that those choices were ours to make and not some universally forged blueprint written in stone.

The belief that fate intervenes to ensure the life chosen for us plays out as planned.

I, as many others, have been privy to moments that practically screamed, “sorry, you need to do this or that and not the other.” Actually, I must say destiny has a pretty big mouth.

The Italians have an expression, “La forza del destino,” the force of destiny.

So if that’s true perhaps knowing the future isn’t really a very good idea. Especially if we can’t change or make it better.

It would probably be more painful to eliminate the element of surprise. We’d have to live knowing that something bad is going to happen we can’t fix.

Isn’t it enough we often feel so helpless and frustrated when faced with unexpected tragedy we wished we could have changed?

I suppose we’d all like to believe we could have “do overs.” That a momentary lapse of judgement ruined an outcome we hoped for. Or ignoring that little voice in the pit of our stomach that’s screaming, “Danger Will Robinson,” was a foolish thing to have done. I imagine the real question is; Can we control destiny through wishing? Or must we merely accept reality and come to terms with our fate?

So many people I know believe you carve out your own life. I suppose to a large extent, this is true. The daily choices we make like vanilla or chocolate, Maj Jong or canasta, drive or walk, belong to us.

But what about the life changing ones like, when we are born, die and whom we marry? What path we follow or do we have what it takes to overcome the great challenges one may face? These may not be ours to choose.

Perhaps it’s a bit of both, or none, I’m not the boss of the universe so I can’t say.

I just know I’d like to believe we have a bit to say about how we live our lives and even what our future will be. But then again, I also believe in Santa Claus, the Ark of the Covenant and the FBI spying on me through my computer camera. So maybe I’m not one to give advice.

Still, I’ll opt to play genie here and wish all your choices work out as you’d want. Maybe just the wishing can help make it happen. One can only hope.

My Metabolism Retired to Boca Raton

I received a text the other day from my metabolism. It retired to Boca Raton in 2011 and has been playing canasta and doing Zumba ever since. Break ups are never easy and this one was definitely tough.

Occasionally I will run into a friend who saw my metabolism at a Chili’s Restaurant when vacationing there and report that it looks wonderful. Rested and suntan and living its best life.

Why not? It should look amazing! My metabolism hasn’t worked a day for over seventy years.

It decided to go off the clock when I was ten and hasn’t done an hour’s work ever since.

I remember many times when I would exercise to give it a boost and I heard snoring inside me. I walked miles on the treadmill, sweating and panting to lose even an ounce and the lazy bugger slept.

Oh, so too busy to be bothered with doing your job huh? And I ran harder, my face red and filled with agony as my metabolism just snoozed and acted like it didn’t have a care in the world.

As you can imagine it was quite a hostile relationship. Believe me I tried, but it was obvious we were totally incompatible.

Yes, I admit it. We didn’t get along. We fought more than a married couple who hatred one another, but stayed together just to torture their mate.

The battles were constant. No matter how little I ate, it would all go straight to the fat cells.

It didn’t pass go, collect 200 calories or ever have a face to face with what should have been the guard at the pudgy portal.

My metabolism lazed like a sleeping security man as someone robbed the jewelry store.

In fact, I’m not sure it wasn’t inviting more calories in to join the party.

“Hey chocolate chip cookie here’s a place for you in her midriff. Come on guys let’s do an all- butterscotch bash in her boobs. PARTY ON!

So many of my friends refused to show up when I threw a don’t-let-the-door-hit-you-in-the-ass gala for my absent metabolism. They too were disgusted by the way it had treated me all those years.

I was like a wife divorcing a husband who had beaten her every day and kept the boxing gloves as a memento of their time together.

Growing up I do remember my metabolism complained a great deal. “What the hell is this new diet pill? I told you I hate Metrecal!”

Sunday nights when I was a kid and my family went out for Chinese food, it always grumbled I wasn’t eating enough. “Hey scarf down that extra egg foo young so I won’t be hungry in an hour.”

Few times do I remember my metabolism actually happy. It did seem pretty overjoyed though when I ate hot fudge cream puffs at Sanders, a favorite Detroit confectionary store. Then it was a happy camper. It knew that none of those thousands of calories I was ingesting would disturb its sleep.

It absolutely jumped for joy when the Good Humor truck came ringing its bell down our street. My metabolism was very partial to ice cream sandwiches and why not? It got all the fun and no work.

Meanwhile it never cared that I was the one constantly busting out of my clothes and gaining more weight than a politician’s bag full of lies.

So I’m guessing Boca is the perfect place for my metabolism to retreat. Still, retire from what I have no idea. Why would it even need to lay back when it never worked anyway?

When it told me it was moving to Boca of course my first question was why, when it had never done anything to retire from? I was shocked at the anger that blew back in my face.

“Seriously, I’m really sick and tired of hearing you bitch about me. I have ears and I hear the way you talk about me to your friends, your family, anyone on earth who will listen to you complain.

“I have feelings you know. No one likes to hear that they are a lazy good for nothing every single day non-stop.

“Wah, wah, wah, I can’t eat a crumb without gaining weight. Boo hoo, my pants don’t zip. Well. Cry me a river, Bitch. I’ve had it. How in the world could any metabolism keep up with your chocolate cravings? Your need for pizza or excuse me, it’s obvious you never learned that a pint of Hagen Das is not one serving.

“I tried to make this work. I attended meetings for abused metabolisms and we all decided finally to get out and enjoy ourselves in Boca.

“The food is good the weather is great and you can always find a card game. I had no intention of spending the rest of my life listening to you blabber about your weight gains, your tight clothes and your inability to eat thousands of calories with no consequences.

“Let me bring out my violin and you can sing your sad song as you jump on the scale for the fiftieth time today.

“But I won’t have to hear it, cause I’ll be in Boca living the life.

“You enjoy your calorie laden treats and licking out the center of those Oreos, but I’m taking a pass.”

I was speechless. Okay, only for a minute and I shot back. “Well go on. Be lazy run away from your responsibilities. I should have known you’d cop out and leave me high and dry!”

“See ya, tubby,” it said as it walked out the door, suitcase in hand and smiling like a lobbyist passing out graft.

I just sat down in shock pondering how I’d survive without a metabolism when it struck me.

How much did it weigh? Could I have lost a few now that it was gone?

I ran to the scale and jumped on. Down two pounds.

Good riddance I thought as I walked into the kitchen to celebrate with a slice of leftover pizza.

I feel lighter already I whispered to no one in particular. Hmmm, how much does an appendix weigh?

What Do You Do When There’s Nothing to Do?

What Do You Do

When There’s Nothing to Do?

“We are always the same age inside…” Gertrude Stein

There are way too many new realities to accept when you are talking about the laugh laugh golden years. One of these is that once you stop working and raising your children life changes.

So what do you do with all the extra time?

Despite claims otherwise ageism is the last and most accepted form of ism in America.

There doesn’t seem to be any downside to businesses or corporations that pass on hiring “older” people. No one would actually ever admit they weren’t hiring you for age reasons, but there are always red flags.

Years ago I interviewed for a newspaper job in Los Angeles with a business newspaper.

The editor was someone I had known and was very familiar with my work.

During the interview he asked, “would you feel out of place working among all young people?”

Hello, red flag warning and surprise of course I didn’t get that job.

I have a friend who is far past the retirement age for teachers. Due to tenure her job is secure and she can work up until the time she can no longer find her way to the school. I have no doubt that even after the state says she can no longer drive she will be Ubering to work every day.

I totally understand because she is absolutely someone who would be lost unless she had somewhere to go every day.  

However not everyone is a teacher with tenure, so what does a person who is perfectly capable of continuing to contribute to society do to keep functioning?

I always think about Iris Apfel who now in her nineties and still running a successful design business.

Let’s face it, it’s easier when you’re in the arts and a creative person to keep rolling on, but of course you needn’t be Picasso to enjoy taking art classes.

I’ve thought about ageing a great deal and have spoken about it many times so obviously it’s bugging me plenty. I guess I get extra whiny on this subject.

Here’s why. When I was a kid in Florida visiting my grandparents, I’d see older people sitting on the porches of the hotels across from the ocean, rocking and talking and I never thought that could happen to me, but maybe deep down I did. And I’m not judging. If someone is happy sitting and relaxing it’s all good.

Yet I must ask…what can you do when you have nothing to do?

If the pandemic taught us anything it’s that one can fill their days and let’s face it we were shoved into our homes to face and fill 24-hours.

Still we all found ways to be productive and even enjoy the down time away from the hustle and bustle of daily life.

Eventually we all figured out ways to POD with our families, work streaming TV and find places from which to order toilet paper.

I’m reminded of how much our lives became reminiscent of when our children were young and a snow or rainy day came along.

As parents we often had to round up our kids and find fun and interesting things to do to fill those hours.

So now suddenly at this age we have become our own parent and we are the kids with nothing to do.

I guess we could bring out the arts and crafts boxes and cut snowflakes.

Paint T-shirts maybe?

After the pandemic I can’t even look at another jigsaw puzzle.

Cooking? Oh right, my cardiologist would be thrilled that I was in the kitchen finding new ways to fill my face.

Exercise? If I hated it when I was young why would I want to do that now?

I have friends who play pickleball and God bless them for it, but my feet start bitching the moment I step out of bed in the morning.

Of course there’s the tried and true older person fall back fun stuff like Bridge, Maj Jong, Canasta and anything that involves sitting at a table and intermittently reaching for the nearby bowl of M&Ms or nuts.

In a new world one would think there are tons of new options available for golden yearers. Is all we can hope for the same old same old and videos of us dancing with our grandchildren on Instagram Reels?

Despite the fact a majority of seniors avail themselves of the new technology playing scrabble online can’t fill a day.

I am fortunate in that I play Roblox, whatever that is, with my grandsons online. I have no idea what I’m doing but as long as it’s with my boys I’m happy.

But what about the rest of the hours in a day?

Can we still find ways to feel relevant and in control?

Time to shift gears to optimistic here.

I say yes.

I truly believe there are more opportunities now than ever before.

I have been able to do things and achieve goals now I couldn’t before because of my age. So from a certain perspective there is definitely an upside to this aging thing.

I needn’t list the enormous variety of options available to fill our days, but a new one is definitely leaf peeping and yes that’s a real thing.

I guess the list is endless actually, but it does take a certain amount of commitment.

It’s great to have a group of friends who will inspire and force you to make plans and join in the fun.

I don’t pretend any ideas are new or revolutionary and haven’t been used for ages. It does seem though that there should be some new ones out there and that’s just it, there doesn’t seem to be any.

The options for filling our days are pretty much set in stone and in this exciting and scary new world, one would like to think there are new places to visit and new adventures to be had.

Space travel which I believed would be an option by now is unavailable, so I don’t think I’ll be joining Flash Gordon on Mars anytime soon.

Like most of us I thought it would be different this whole aging thing, but life is pretty much as expected.

Youth, careers, kids, grandkids, and arthritis.

Nothing much new there.

So is life actually predestined? If we reach a certain age can we hope for nothing more than our parents or grandparents were able to experience? Costco, walks in the mall, various activities and of course constant doctor visits. Even if you’re well.

What did I expect? I thought new and exciting times would exist for us, but nope, pretty much the same.

We do live longer and feel better now than our parents, so being able to fill our days with fun things to do should be easier.

When I look at life it’s pretty obvious we can be as busy or as idle as we choose and it’s up to us to decide.

I don’t know what I was expecting, but when once our problem was how to find any free time now it’s about finding ways to stay busy. Kinda upside down so maybe that’s why I feel discombobulated. I imagine the important take away is it doesn’t matter what we choose to do with our time, as long as we enjoy what we’re doing. But that’s really what it’s all about at any age, isn’t it?

Crunchy Apple Pork Chops in Cream Sauce

6 pork chop tenderloins or chops with bone in can also be used, but cooking time will increase.

2 apples (your choice) peeled, cored and sliced

¼ cup apple cider vinegar

2 cups heavy cream

1 cup flour seasoned with salt and pepper

1 ½ cups panko crumbs

1 ½ cups dried apple chips ground up well

1 tbsp butter

1 tablespoon of oil

Salt and pepper to taste

Season pork slices with salt and pepper and set aside

Put apple chips in the food processer and ground up well, but not too fine. Combine with panko crumbs. 

Melt butter and oil in frying pan and dip pork into flour and pat off excess. Dip chops into beaten egg then into panko/apple mixture.

Add to frying pan and sear until golden brown. Remove from pan and place in oven at 350 degrees until internal temperature of 150 degrees is reached.

Add apples and cider to frying pan and sauté apples until fork tender and then add cream. Heat over low heat until cream reduces by one third. Taste sauce and add salt and pepper if necessary.

Add back pork into frying pan and cover with cream sauce and heat through two more minutes until all is combined and warm.

Serve over any pasta or rice or with a mashed potato.