Tag: Bambi

No Endings Just Reruns

Endings is one of those interesting happenings in life that can either be good or bad. Life changing or life improving. Sometimes both.

Some endings are a good thing. Such as getting over a sickness or out of a bad relationship.

Many are sad.  Losing those we love, getting fired from a job we like, break ups.

Yet there are many endings in life more benign yet still bring a sense of loss.

Not any that you would notice any big difference, just a bit of sadness. That passing sense of loss that sweeps over you like a chilly Autumn breeze.

So many human beings are addicted to the familiar. Many of us need a certain sameness about our existence. Things we can count on and over which we feel a sense of control.

A morning routine, daily workouts; I wouldn’t know about that. A morning coffee and muffin; that I would definitely know about.

Among these are television shows and movies. Yes, we seem to attach ourselves to certain characters. We soon look forward to returning to a certain place to see people we’ve come to invest in and like. It just feels comfortable being in their presence.

There is absolutely a certain sadness finishing a movie that has completely captured your attention. We’ve become a part of these character’s existences, adventures, pain and happiness.

The ending seems so final and television is no different. Years ago, before the advent of streaming we would wait an entire week to revisit Andy and Barney and travel to Mayberry.

We had questions, most of which remained unanswered.

There was a sense of anticipation about what might happen to the Friends each week. Would Ross and Rachel get together?

Would Joey Tribiani explode from eating too many pizzas?

Would Mr. Phelps accept the mission?

Did Captain Kirk wear a girdle?

Would they ever make room for Daddy?

Would Kramer slip running into Jerry’s apartment or Elaine learn to dance?

Did Columbo ever wash that raincoat?

Would Zelda Gilroy ever catch Dobie Gillis?

Would Ozzie Nelson ever put on a suit and go to work?

How the hell Samantha stayed married to Darrin!

These shows became part of our daily lives and formed a commonality with friends and family.

How often we’d go to parties where the discussion centered around, who killed JR? Or were Ross and Rachel on a break? It as common and something shared on which to agree.

Many would merely say television became part of our culture. I believe it transcended entertainment. We came to depend on these shows each week. Much like visiting Grandma and looking forward to her amazing cookies hot from the oven.

There was a definite sadness at the end of Friends when they walked off toward Central Perk. A moment of what-the-hell-was-that when the Seinfeld cast sat in prison or an Oh-My-God moment when the lights came on and Suzanne Pleshette was in bed with Bob Newhart.

Of course we moved on after these characters left our lives, but it wasn’t without a tinge of sadness.

When something familiar and comforting leaves us, there is suddenly a void that must be filled.

We wait for a new show to catch our attention. One that will fulfill the loss left by the ones that disappeared. I suppose that’s why so many sequels and characters that move to new shows become hits. We are already familiar and relaxed with these individuals. Eager to follow their activities.

You may be thinking, this is no big deal, shows come and go and moving on is easy.

Of course we’re built to move on. But these places and people stay with us as repositories of our memories. We forget so much in life, but hearing “Hi Ho Silver” conjures up a time or special memory about our childhood.

A show shared with a grandparent or the way your father laughed when Jackie Gleason barked, “to the moon, Alice.”

We can actually experience emotion remembering something that happened in an unforgettable film.

Bambi’s mother, Old Yeller,  the shower scene in Psycho, “Luke, I am your father,” Planet of the Apes Statue of Liberty  on the beach ending, Dead Poets, Titanic, One Flew Over the Cuckoo’s Nest, Love Story (Yes, I know pure soap opera, but memorable), The Sixth Sense, The Usual Suspects, Colonel Blake’s death in M.A.S.H., The Fugitive, or who would win the American Bandstand dance contest?

The Sopranos (another what the hell ending) and any ending on the The Twilight Zone.

There are so many more that evoke memories or another laugh or tear.

Things have changed with the advent of streaming in that you can binge watch episodes without a break. Still, I’m not quite certain if part of the fun of the watching was in the waiting. The anticipation of how something would turn out and conjuring up your own scenarios.

Reruns are popular no doubt. Do we revisit these shows because we love revisiting them, like old friends? Or is it that they evoke precious childhood memories? Remembrances we so need to keep those gone from our lives with us?

Probably a bit of both. Nobody should knock nostalgia as it serves a valuable purpose.

Well, gotta go watch a Gilligan rerun. I thought of a way for them to finally get off that island.

How to be Happy at a Certain Age

How to Be Happy at a Certain Age

At what age are we allowed to stop listening to Tony Robbins?

After a lifetime of making decisions, bad and good don’t we earn the right to cover our ears when someone tells us how to have our best life?

Excuse me! Haven’t we already done that? And when we are at an age when we’ve pretty much become what we are or ever will be, how can these gurus help us now?

This morning my big dilemma was whether or not to get my haircut. Yes, I know it’s hardly anything to get into a quandary about. Still, it involved some long-range thinking about when I might go if not today and trying to fit it in between doctor appointments. So at what point would Wayne Dyer, Tony Robbins, Les Brown or anyone’s advice help me make this earth-shattering choice?

Since I’ve spent a lifetime hearing the adage, “Never put off until tomorrow etc. etc.” I now feel perfectly comfortable putting anything I want off until anytime I want.

I have firmly decided that the word ornery as it pertains to older people is in itself justified.

Are we ornery if we simply feel we deserve to make our own choices, plan our own days and see who we wish to see? Is this a flaw in an otherwise kindly and easy-going nature.

How many times have we heard the expression he or she is so stubborn now? I can’t get them to do anything anymore.

You bet you can’t. For why should we? After a life of living up to other’s expectations of how we should act, raise our children, dress, and think and feel a certain way, it’s okay to say no.

I believe it’s perfectly acceptable when our daughters tell us Mom that purple nail polish is too young for you, to nod and say okay and then wear it anyway.

When the lease from my car ran out it had fewer miles on it than a demo. So I decided to buy it instead of leasing again.

My son called and asked me if I had made up my mind this was the best thing to do.

I said yes, I love my car and I want to keep it.

“Okay Mom,” he said. “But are you certain this is the car you want to drive for the rest of your life?”

What am I 90 years old? How do I know? Perhaps in three years I’ll decide I want another car. But I didn’t say that. I knew he was thinking that soon he and his sister would be seriously considering taking away the car keys. Although I have no intention for quite a while.

So yes, now we have established that my kids think I’m 100 years old and have one foot out the door.

But I don’t and will not start to think that way for some time to come.

As poet Dylan Thomas wrote; Do not go gentle into that good night,
Old age should burn and rave at close of day;
Rage, rage against the dying of the light.

Here, here to Dylan Thomas! But gentle may be the only way you can go when your arthritis is acting up.

Sadly, many of my friends admit their kids see them as old as well. But are we supposed to sit in the house and stop living just waiting around for old Grim Reaper to ring our doorbell?

I wouldn’t answer anyway. Let him think he has the wrong address for a while.

If there is one positive about aging it’s the feeling of freedom it brings. We are no longer constrained by societal norms. Nor are we limited by anything but our own tired aching bones.

As long as I am still winning arguments with my hips and able to scamper along, just call me Bambi.

Please understand I’m not saying that when we’re young and forging our path through life, these gurus can’t make a positive impact. But by my age one should know it’s all a state of mind.

Because others see us as old doesn’t mean we see ourselves that way. Our mirrors reflect a younger us.

Mind over matter is probably more important in old age because if we begin giving into our creaky bones, they get the upper hand.

If our gray hair is all we see, it’s over. If we face the fact our children have suddenly become what they perceive as the parents, we will feel as old as they see us.

I always gave into my children and still do, especially my grandchildren, but I also have cultivated a sense of amusement at it all.

Did Wayne Dyer ever talk about how to get through a day when you are in pain? Did he ever tell someone how to look in the mirror and refuse to see the wrinkles that suddenly popped up on their face?

No, I’m afraid that’s a life lesson one can only learn through experience.

What kind of person we are is formed throughout our life and when we reach the laugh-laugh golden years, we find ourselves falling back on old coping mechanisms. These life lessons help fend off the limitations we may face.

My choice is humor, others may choose golf, pickleball, cards, joining clubs, taking up art, travel or a new hobby.

I have decided grandchildren keep you young. So who needs gurus when you have those adorable little faces looking up at you? Not me, most definitely not me.

So if your kids look at you like you are the Crypt Keeper, if the world sees an old person as you pass by and if you can’t walk as fast as you once did at the mall, it’s all okay.

Even gurus get old and if any one of them has the answer of how to live forever, I’ll buy that book.